Abbey-Roads2

Pictured, “The Temptation of St. Anthony”  Witness how the saint is lifted by demons and temptations, suspended from rational thought.  An excellent illustration of temptation.

The saints felt as if they had sinned as well.

A friend asked me that question the other day, “Why does temptation feel like sin?”  Since he was a young man, I suspected it may have had something to do with temptations against chastity.  However, he never clarified it for me, but I answered accordingly.  (It is an excellent question.)

When one is engaged in the spiritual battle with temptation to any sin, especially if one is conscious of it as a temptation, it can be difficult to differentiate from consent and resistance.  Since the passions or appetites are immediately engaged, and the proposed good is so appealing, the senses anticipate, as it were, some manner of gratification - albeit not willed or fully consented to.  

If a male glimpses pornography for instance.  “Boing!”  The physical reaction can be immediate.  (I’ve written about this before.)  The sexual appetite experiences an immediate gratification.  It’s biological.  The intellect is stimulated and judgement is clouded - so you look a little bit longer or click the mouse to go onto another image.  It’s natural curiosity - although you just entered into a near occasion of sin.  Now you have to watch out.

We must avoid occasions of sin as soon as we perceive them.  And that may take a little bit of time in the admixture of temptation, physical response, along with the process of recognition as to what is going on.

The nature of temptation caused even the saints to feel defiled, perhaps even engulfed in sin.

An example of defiling temptation.

One morning at Mass - when I was much younger and cuter - after a night enduring temptations against chastity, I noticed an attractive young woman as I entered the chapel at St. Olaf’s.  For some reason I turned to look at the same woman, standing across the isle from me,  although a few rows behind.  (I suppose I wanted to see where she was seated - although the act seemed spontaneous and involuntary.)  I caught myself and immediately turned my attention back to the Mass.  Suddenly, my imagination represented the same woman to me in a bikini, smiling at me.  I was so distracted by the image I could not recollect myself for the Eucharistic prayer, the next thing I knew I was receiving communion, in a state of distraction.  I honestly never experienced anything like that before.  I knelt for my thanksgiving, convinced I had committed a sin, repenting for an umworthy communion, yet a tremendous peace came over me, and all of the confusion and impure movements ceased.  That day I understood clearly what temptation is and why it can feel so much like sin.

Oftentimes the memory supplies us with images or experiences from our past.  Images and passionate feelings, physical or otherwise, are not sins, unless willfully accepted and entertained.  The fact that they persist and nearly overwhelm, does not mean a person consents to these.  I think of it as a sudden summer storm, or better, a tropical storm.  Once in Puerto Rico, I was laying in the sun by the pool at my hotel, while across a small inlet, a thunder storm was in progress - maybe just a few blocks away.  I imagined myself on the storm side - looking across the bay at the beautiful sunshine, with the placid ocean and clear blue sky in view.

In the same way, one who is assaulted with temptations, especially visual or sensate experiences, must endeavor to maintain one’s peace, and gaze across the bay, as it were, calling on the Lord and endeavoring to fix one’s attention on Him.  Yet most critically, have peaceful and confident recourse to Our Lady, who can quell even the most violent storms.   Let the images blow by, as leaves in a whirlwind, while keeping your attention fixed upon Jesus and Our Lady.  So often, it is in  and through the confusion and lack of peace that the evil one can easily seduce the soul.  Especially so when one is already stressed or tired.

The flesh wars against the spirit.

God remembers we are flesh and blood, and the flesh wages war against the spirit- He knows this.  Young men, you need to believe this.  There is no sin without fully informed, consent of the will, and deliberate act.  Never let the devil trick you into thinking that you have sinned already and therefore may as well go all the way.  NEVER let him add links to your chain.  

Temptation, by its nature is dirty feeling, hence it feels like sin already.  Sin is worse.  Nevertheless, if you do fall, the Lord in His love and mercy awaits you in the sacrament of penance - this is your victory however - and remember the Lord loves you in your humility and confidence.

Holy Mother St. Teresa was speaking to nuns who are tempted to exaggerated humility when she wrote the following.  Nevertheless it is applicable to all temptation, with the emphasis added, “it will be a great thing if you can recognize it as a temptation.” - When you’re in the throes of it.   

“When you find yourselves in this state, cease thinking, so far as you can, of your own wretchedness, and think of the mercy of God and of His love and His sufferings for us. If your state of mind is the result of temptation, you will be unable to do even this, for it will not allow you to quiet your thoughts or to fix them on anything but will only weary you the more: it will be a great thing if you can recognize it as a temptation.”  Teresa of Avila, “Way of Perfection” Chapter 39