I found this interesting…
Boy friends.
GN: You said they (men leaving homosexuality) need close male relationships. How can men struggling with homosexual feelings have a close male relationship without those feelings becoming sexual?
Joseph Nicolosi: Well, he’s going to have those feelings. No doubt about it. And he shouldn’t be afraid of those feelings but he has to learn how to translate those feelings into authentic friendship.
One of the questions I often ask a man just beginning therapy, I will say to him, “Have you had the experience of being sexually attracted to a guy but when you got to know him as a person and a friend, the sexual attraction disappeared?” And they almost always say, “Yes.” And I ask, “Why do you think that was so?”
They have no answer for it. Because they have translated the mystique and there is no more sexual energy there. It is now a friendship and when you develop that kind of brotherly feeling, the idea of having sex is absurd. That’s exactly the process they have to go through time and time again until all men seem like just other guys and there is nothing sexual about them. - Source
My response.
Over the years I have observed that the same sex couples I’ve known, really became more friends or brothers than lovers. If sexual relations continued in their relationship, it had to be supplemented by pornography, drugs, promiscuous behavior, or sharing sex partners. More often than not, the relationship appeared to turn into what could only be termed a co-dependent attachment, rather than an union or marriage in the typical understanding of those terms.
On the other hand, I once met a couple of men who had decided to live together chastely in order to be able to receive the sacraments. Accepting Catholic teaching regarding same-sex activities, their partnership turned into a very deep friendship and they lived together as brothers, devoting themselves to prayer and good works. They have been together now for over 30 years, while they have maintained loyalty to Christ and one another as chaste celibates for over 28 years. Fr. Benedict Groeschl once referred to their situation as “their own little Courage group”.
July 22nd, 2008 at 6:56 am
Yahtzee! You got it!
July 22nd, 2008 at 7:52 am
Hurricane preparations on Leo’s hay farm, they look like a couple big fellers in that picture Terry, I could use them to help trim the mesquite branches and haul them off to the dump before Dolly starts a blowin’ them around and destroying property. My holy wife tries but she just ain’t got the muscle power, family’s too dispersed to be of any use, we all got jobs and lives you know, so its just me and the hired man. I’d wager that if we all had practical concerns like keepin’ the chickens from blowing’ away in a storm and prayin’ to God that the hay don’t dry up and burn in the years of drought that these fellas would have less time to introspect about their feelings for other men and find constructive ways to put that muscle power to good use. I just think that the loss of agriculture and industry in the USofA has given too many idle hands for the devils workshop. Maybe 5 dollar gas is what we need to get less fashion sense and more horse sense for our marginalized men. At least these thoughts come to me when a hurricane is stirrin’ up the Gulf. God bless you all.
July 22nd, 2008 at 8:07 am
This morning I realized I posted the draft - the finished post is up now - To be fair, it finishes with a paragraph about a same-sex partnership that did work out.
July 22nd, 2008 at 8:13 am
Sorry, that was me getting a bit MEDIEVAL - taken from the Rule of St. Benedict:
“CHAPTER XLVIII
Of the Daily Work
Idleness is the enemy of the soul; and therefore the brethren ought to be employed in manual labor at certain times, at others, in devout reading. Hence, we believe that the time for each will be properly ordered….”
Please note the use of the term “properly ordered” again in contrast to “disordered” use of time and effort. But theres a storm coming, so I gotta git to my properly ordered functions of this day for the love of God and family.
July 22nd, 2008 at 11:14 am
Dear Mr. Leo ,Praise God for your holy wives that hafta pick up your slack
I hope that you are able to get through okay when Dolly passes by. I will pray for your family.
Your right Leo, Idle hands, (and minds) are the work of the devil. I am always impressed with the Priests that work the hardest ,because they are most likely to stay outta’ trouble. Like my kids .
I say “get to work”. Thinking can be very dangerous for my children.
You know Leo everything that you said is correct, I would add, that if these men would put their thoughts ,and creativity to good use maybe collectively we could ditch the combustable gasoline engine. Why is my computer outdated at 4 years old ,yet my cars engine is a hundred and fifty year old idea. I say MEN get back to your garages and tinker, that is why we have refrigerators, airplanes, computers ,and most everything else.
Other Nations take our ideas ,and make them their own ,but AMERICANS invent ,create, and make peoples lives better! Men reclaim your minds and your garages!!!
Leo, I have a better idea for those mesquite branches !! I live outside of Kansas City, and I can practically smell that barbeque from here!! Maybe some ribs, or some pulled pork. Oh my stars !!yum !!